Dating, and Relationships: The Importance of Keeping Yourself Accountable

1. Keeping yourself accountable helps you reduce the dependency on the other person for your own happiness.

Personal Example: Sure I could skip my workout and hangout with my girl later tonight, but I missed my alarm, but all I’m doing is increasing my dependency and power to my girl in the relationship for my own happiness, by saying ahhhh it sucks I didn’t make it to the gym but at I’ll be happy to see my girl later. 

Simply no, not because I do not love my girl, I truly do, but by not holding myself accountable I am that much less of a man, because I chose to put my happiness somewhere else, rather than in doing what I HAVE to do as a man. 

This is what I look like when I get out of the shower

Now am I saying to blow off a date, of course not, keep your word. I am saying it places the same value and importance on the things you do for yourself, as you do in hanging out with your girl, wife, or even your friends. 

The bottom line is do what you have to do, and if you do not, keep yourself accountable and keep the accountability simple. Simply put, I missed the gym, accountability, no time with my girl tonight. 

What’s the power in that? I assign more happiness and fulfillment to myself in the accountability rather than damn, I missed the gym today, but I’ll hang with my girl tonight and go tomorrow. 

In the words of Apollo Creed in Rocky III: “There is no Tomorrow!!”

2. If you can’t keep yourself accountable, it will be that much harder to keep your girl accountable and establish healthy boundaries. 

Let’s face it, if you can’t keep yourself accountable, and pivot accountability to happiness by spending time with your girl, it is going to be that much harder to keep your girl accountable if you feel disrespected, or just not being treated the way you’d like to be treated in this moment.

Why? Well in that moment of choosing accountability and going to the gym, I chose accountability and going to the gym, but what happens when you feel disrespected, you can choose accountability (Hey Babe, that’s kind of not cool what you said, I don’t appreciate that), or you can choose to defer and not say anything. Why? Because it is easier, just like it’s easier to choose hanging out with your girl rather than going to the gym, it’s also easier to choose not to keep them accountable then it is to keep them accountable. 

3. There is real power in keeping yourself accountable and being calm at the same time

One reason why I love this blog, and writing is because I get to use my own flaws and mistakes, and reflect on them, and pay it forward. Face it, I could have been easily annoyed, and upset, and let it ruin my whole day, especially as this has been a pattern for a while. 

However I chose accountability (I chose an action), not an emotion. To be fair while I still definitely had an emotion, it was definitely minimal. By choosing accountability we also choose to be calm about being accountable. By being calm about it, I was able to take a clear action, communicate it calmly with my girl and then even lean into it even more during the workout. 

I chose accountability, I gotta go to the gym tonight and can’t see my girl, like I normally would. If I would have not chosen to keep myself accountable, I’d be mad at myself, omg you’ve haven’t been to the gym in a few days, you’re not the same, your clothes are fitting tighter. 

Guess what it’s all true, but by choosing accountability, I also chose action, and also reduced as I say my emotional thermometer. Guess what I learned and reminded my body, getting up for the gym is important so I can cap off my day just right, by watching Knicks Celtics, and hanging with my girl. 

Next Steps

So tell me, what are the little things you know you have to get done in the day, why do you have to get them done? And what is the simple way you can keep yourself accountable?

So Shoot me an email with any comments, or suggestions, or even questions. 

As I start out with this blog and business, I encourage you all to come along and grow with me. 

If you’d like, you can schedule a free-15 minute phone call, just so I can hear your story, and see how I can help, and if we can work together. 

For now my rates are only cash based starting at 100.00/session (50 Minutes). 

My story will slowly come out, more importantly if you are reading this blog, I hope one day to pay my story forward, hear about yours, and be there along the way.