How and why to avoid the too much texting but no date Pitfall

At the end of this blog post, I am going to show you why just because a girl texts you frequently, it doesn’t mean she is going to go out with you.

At the end of this blog post, I am going to show you why this is true, and how you can avoid this trap.

Here’s the bottom line

A girl can appear to express a lot of interest in you by texting once, twice or even three times a day. But until you are physically on the date with her, none of it matters, a text is a just a text.

Here’s how I found this out.

This one girl I matched with on a dating app, began to text me right away, and a lot.

As the days went on she continuously would hit me up throughout the day with text messages, sometimes even two to three conversations a day.

It was totally great for me (I thought), because I had just assumed this was immediate interest and attraction.

Finally we had a date set

When the day of the date came, she told me car broke down.

Did it really?

Who knows. The bottom line is she didn’t feel like going out with me, and who could blame her.

If I were her

I’d want to go out with a man who would say, “Hey, I’d love to meet up for a drink, when are you free?”

Why would she want to go out with a man like that? Because a man like that is direct, decisive and going for what he wants.

Instead she essentially got me saying, ‘We can totally text back and forth because you’re hot, and texting you makes me feel good about myself.’

Here’s the truth

I was happy, and smiling each time, this girl texted me, because she was hot, and I just assumed this was interest, and I felt better about each time she did text me.

What I should have done is said, ‘I love talking to you, but I really want to see you, when are you free?’

I should have asked when she’s free, not been content to play digital pen-pal.

Take her interest for what it is.

In that moment she chooses to text you, she is interested in seeing you, so make the date. If she can’t make the date, don’t take it personally, just move on.

Don’t be afraid to say what you really want which is a date, otherwise you’ll just be dragged along for her ride, and not that kind of ride (hehe).

All that will happen is you’ll talk more, get more interested, invested, in the idea of even going out with her. I want you to be interested in plans, not a pen-pal.

That’s why dating rule number Four is Make the Date: Don’t Validate (yourself).