What are you Unhappy About, and What Are You Willing to Do About it?

by Joseph Gherman

This week’s blog post and therapy session focuses on the things we know we are unhappy about, and the more important question of what are we willing to do about it?

What’s up guys, I’m Joe the Therapist. I post videos, blog posts, and all sorts of content, about the world of self-help and personal growth, especially in the context of dating, relationships and marriages.

This week’s therapy session for our blog, is going to focus on the things we’re not happy with, and an important question we should ask ourselves, what are we willing to do about it?

Here’s where this comes from

This blog post and ‘content,’ (if you will) is inspired by the introduction of my upcoming book, ‘‘Enjoy Your Dating Life- How to Match With, Date, and Be with Your True Ten.’’

And while the book is still in progress, the lessons that guide it are continuously ongoing, and tools I use for myself and my clients in therapy.

This blog post came about from a point in my life, where I was really unhappy about something, my relationship, my eight-year relationship.

I was unhappy and knew it for a long time. In the end, what I was willing to do about it was end it. It sucked to end it, but it was absolutely the right thing to do.

But that’s enough about me, what about you?

I want you to ask yourself a couple of questions. What really brought you to this blog post? Chances are it’s because you aren’t happy about something. What is it your not happy about it?

Is it about your dating life, your relationship or even your marriage. Is it about your job, career, your mission your purpose?

Is it that you want to get in better shape and lose a few pounds, whether it’s ten, 20, more, or gain a few pounds.

Or is it something to do with saving for a fun vacation, a rainy day, or just being better with personal finance.

This blog is about personal growth, not just dating and relationships.

Let’s be honest, we all have different struggles and areas of growth we want to focus on and grow in. As people we are forever growing and working toward goals. As a therapist, it’s my job to help you work past any challenge, whether it’s in my office, or in a blog post.

And if we are really being honest, all of these our aspects of our lives (relationships, money, getting in shape, and enjoying our careers), are all something we experience pain, frustration and want to grow from.

We also want to have balance and joy in all of them. This usually means defining goals, what progress is, and also having priorities. Each of these areas is what I call the burners on the stove top (health, wealth, career, and personal lives).

Why the stove top? I like cooking, and each stovetop has four burners. I like to think of life and growth as cooking a nice meal for yourself, day in and day out.

It’s my belief and value in they’re importance in creating true long-term happiness and progress is the reason why I incorporate them into my blog posts and therapy.

So ask yourself, What are you not happy about?

I’ll go first and keep it real, I’m not happy with being ten pounds heavier then I was two years ago, I’m not happy that I have clothes in my closet that fit me better two years ago.

As to what I’m willing to do about it, it’s been a more focused and more restrictive diet, especially at night. But that is enough about me, what are you not happy about?

Are you not happy with your dating life? Your relationship? Your marraige?

Are you not happy with the money you have saved for a fun vacation?

Are you not happy with some extra weight you put on? Or even just with your boss, your work, or your career.

Here’s the next question. What are you Willing to do about it?

Are you willing to go to the gym? Go for a walk? Start meal prepping?

Are you willing to save a little extra each month so six months to a year from now you are on an awesome fun vacation.

Are you willing to go on Indeed.com for an hour and just write down all the jobs you interested in? Are you willing to update your resume. Are you willing to start a blog post and video content for a business?

And if you aren’t happy in your dating life, are you willing to go out and start talking to girls as hard as it may be (I know it’s hard).

What if you're not happy in your marriage, or relationship?

Are you willing to talk to your wife about marriage counseling? Are you willing to keep it real with her and say I know things haven’t been good, and I want them to be better?

Are you willing to be nicer, sweeter, kinder, and even less angry to your wife or girlfriend?

If you're not happy in your relationship, are you willing to walk away, or keep it real and communicate what you're not happy about, no matter how tough the conversation might be.

Here’s exactly how I want you to ask yourself this.

What are you not happy about?

The Answer should start with, “I’m not happy with (insert blank)”

The next question should be, “What am I willing to do about it?

The answer: “I’m willing to (insert blank).”

Then, just go do it.

It doesn’t have to be perfect, because it won’t be, it just get’s better and better over time, whatever it is you are choosing to do.

Whatever it is you do want to work on, just make it a point to do it.

Whether it’s a little more exercising, a little more savings, a little more applying for jobs, or even a little more reps chatting up girls in your dating life.

Answer that question and do it.

I write blog posts like this because…

Four years ago, I was reading blog posts and books like these. I was consuming all sorts of self-help personal growth content, especially in the world of dating and relationships.

My work as a therapist focuses on men who want to accomplish and achieve more in their lives, from dating and relationships, to marriage, to any area they just want to grow in.

If you’d like to read more blog posts, you can click here to subscribe to my email newsletter.

If you’d like to work with me, you can contact me here.