Dating: You Have to Be Yourself
by Joseph Gherman
Do you guys ever notice how some dates go better than others? Sure you could say because the girl was into you and more attracted to you than others. but why is that? Well in my opinion it has to do with sometimes we are just able to ourselves.
That’s why today’s blog post is all about how to be yourself, and how exactly you can be yourself, so you can enjoy your dating life, including your next date. It calls out something we already know, but maybe we overlook.
Today’s blog post is all about how exactly to be yourself, and why it really is important for both you and her one the date.
The Real-Life Example:
It was September of 2022 when I went on my first, first date, after ending an eight-year relationship. Let me be clear, I did not have a clue or know what to expect so the only thing I could do was be myself.
So, what was being myself back then? It was talking about the things I love and my experiences, which included, fruity cocktails, football, and of course that Canadian band everyone thinks sucks but is actually really good (you guys know which one the one that keeps reminding you).
Do you know what happened that night? That girl came back to my place, not bad for my first time out there in eight years. But that’s my story, this blog post is your story and how you can be yourself, so you can enjoy your dating life.
Talk about the things you love.
Why should you talk about the things you love? Because that is what makes you, you, whether it’s loving your kids, the Yankees, the Jets, you get the point. When you talk about the things you love, the girl is going to feel something. She is going to feel you are being yourself.
Talking about the things you love also means talking about your experiences. Like your favorite vacations, whether it is a love for cruises, escapes, or fun countries.
When it comes down to it, being yourself in dating is really talking about the things you love, and the experiences you have.
Why does it matter to the girl? She Will Feel Safe
Because when you are being yourself, she is going to have more fun. Think about it. Is she going to have more fun with basic small talk (where you are playing it safe), you are talking about your car, your house. or if you are sharing who you are and what you love?
When you are being yourself by talking about what you love, she will start to feel safe and comfortable. How does she feel safe and comfortable? By seeing you are yourself and not just playing it safe with small talk.
Lastly, why does it matter? Because if she feels safe and comfortable then she is more likely to have fun, go back to your place, the next place, or oblige for that goodnight kiss. You are being yourself and giving a reason that she can be herself and put her guard down.
Being Yourself Creates Attraction
Let’s go back to that real-life example. On that first date referenced earlier, I was probably not the most attractive at 300 pounds and wearing a stupid maroon-red t-shirt. But something was attractive, my confidence in being myself.
Confidence is doing what you know how to do and doing it well. I simply spoke about those things I knew about and loved, which were fruity cocktails, music, and football.
By speaking about what I knew and how I loved these things, I was being my most confident self. All I was doing (accidentally) to generate attraction was speaking with confidence.
For you it might mean speaking about how you love golfing, bowling or your kids. You speak about how you love Anime, or certain genres of music. And just as important you are also listening. Because if you are listening, she will feel and notice that too.
If you’re not listening, she won’t feel heard, understood, and is less likely to have fun. The best way to listen is just giving her your time and attention. Don’t worry about the next part of the date. the kiss, the next place, just listen and be yourself. Take an interest in her!
I post videos and blog posts like this because at one point I was watching and reading all of these.
It’s my purpose to show you if I can date, be with my true ten, and enjoy my dating life, so can you.
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If you are single and dating and want help with your dating profile, you can download my Dating Profile Checklist.
It is the exact profile with each picture and a prompt explaining how I took each picture and why I took each picture to create the best possible dating profile, and how you can take that exact same information and apply it to yourself and your profile. You can download it below.
https://blog.datingandrelationship.services/the-high-value-diy-dating-profile-checklist
