How to go Slow, keep it simple, and get results.
To keep it real…
This idea came from blogging, and thinking about how I can expand this therapy and coaching service . In the month of January, I pushed myself to publish one blog post a day, and while I did it, what is really more important, is the meaning I’ve chosen to give it.
It was more about just publishing a blog, it was really about that simple, but hard thing, (blogging) and doing one simple thing everyday to move my life, and this business forward.
Make no mistake about it, I am sure as hell going to continue blogging, but by going slow with it. I am going to truly immerse myself in writing it, drafting it, editing it, and then publishing it. I’m doing the simple thing still, but choosing to go slow, so I can give you guys the very best there is in self-help, personal growth and therapy.
Ask Yourself
What is that one simple action that would move your life forward?
I want you to take that one simple action you know is going to move your life forward, and be able to do it, but do it slowly. Literally almost slow, as if time is standing still. I want you to feel how peaceful and relaxed you are as you do that hard thing, whether you are on the stair-master at the gym, studying for a test, or approaching that cute girl at the bar.
Speaking of approaching that girl at the bar.
If you were to do something simple, “You’re Cute, What’s Your Name,” but do it slowly, what would it look like? And what would be the benefit from it? Why would you benefit from being slow and deliberate in saying to that cute girl, “I think you are super cute, what’s your name?”
Here’s a little tip on the house, if there is a girl, within arms distance, it could be an indicator. The keyword there is that she is hoping you will talk to her, especially if her body is facing you. By doing that simple, “You’re cute, what is your name?” and doing it slowly you are truly being present with your emotions.
If you are dating a girl you really like, going slow, and doing the simple things is really important. Going slow means waiting two, three or four days before you call her for that next date. Men believe me, I know it hurts, sucks and wonders to wait, and wait, and wait. Doing the simple thing, that quick simple phone call that says, “Hey you are really cute, I had fun the other night and I want to see you, when are you free?”, will go a truly long way in your dating life.
Here is the good thing about doing both things slowly.
You truly get to feel your emotions leading up to it, be present with them after, and refine your approach. You are getting information on yourself, and also how the girl you are interested in is showing up. Is she reciprocating the interest you have put out there; whether it is for her name, or a second date, or is she avoiding you.
Either that girl is going to say
“Hey Thanks, I’m Jill, what’s your name (possible high interest?” or, "Thanks, I’m Jill (low interest likely),” or “
Ok whatever, get out of here.”
The latter is just a rude person. More importantly by going slow you are truly letting yourself be present with all your emotions, thoughts, and feelings throughout the experience.
You get to say after, Ok that wasn’t that bad, I’ll do it again, or you get to run the hell out of there(this is very unlikely). Most importantly by going slow, you get to really feel the emotions, before, after, and the information you need to refine your approach.
You get to say after, Ok that wasn’t that bad, I’ll do it again, or you get to run the hell out of there(this is very unlikely). Most importantly by going slow, you get to really feel the emotions, before, after, and the information you need to refine your approach.
In the case of calling that girl up you really like, especially after a few dates, you get to see if she say,
“Yes that sounds good I’m free Friday,” or
“I don’t know, let me get back to you” or
ignore the call.
Most importantly
For you with your slow and refined approach, you get to truly feel those emotions, and have that okay that was not such a bad moment.
The more moments you have like that, then the more you repeat that behavior, get good at it, and want to grow it, just like blogging for me. I want to keep going, and getting better at it, so I can give you my best and grow this business.
So guys, whether you are single and dating, in a relationship or married, I will help you pick those simple actions that take you forward, go slowly with them and get to where you want to get in those aspects of your life. If you are single and dating, those simple actions done slowly reduce the emotions you feel when approaching the girl.
If you are in a relationship or married the simple action done slowly of listening and just asking your girl, “Hey baby, how was your day,” and then just listening is something so simple that truly moves your life forward. And men, if you are in a relationship or married, listening is one of the best skills you can learn in my therapy and coaching practice. It helps your girl feel like you really care, and she feels heard, understood and validated.
These simple actions, done slowly, are helping you feel the full experience and makes the information you are receiving from the girl at the bar, or on the date, or your wife or girlfriend very clear.
To follow along and contact me
I work with men who are single and dating, in a relationship, and married, along with men who just want to help themselves and grow and develop personally.
If you’d like to contact me for one on one therapy and coaching you can click here..
