Men if You’re Married and Reading This, It Might be Time to Change
Guys, let’s be honest, why are we reading a blog post like this? And just as important, how did we even come across a blog post like this on the internet?
Chances are it’s because you want to fix and change something in your dating and relationship life, whether you are married or in a relationship. If you are married, and not enjoying your marriage, this is a blog post for you.
Now, since you are reading a blog post like this, I want you to ask yourself this question: Is there any part of your behavior you are willing to change? To make your marriage better, awesome, fun, and loving again?
You see, if you ask me, that’s what a relationship and marriage should be, whether you are dating for two years, or married for twenty.
Ask yourself specifically, what are you willing to change? And why are you willing to change it?
If the answer to this question is, “I don’t know,” or “I don’t think I need to,” then this blog post isn’t for you. But chances are, if you are reading a blog post like this, you either know exactly what you need to change, or are at least open to finding out.
You likely came across a blog post like this because you feel a very strong emotion when it comes to your wife or your marriage. Maybe you are worried about your wife leaving. Maybe you never thought you’d hear your wife say the D (divorce) word, and don’t know what to think or do.
Or maybe your wife has been saying it more and more lately, and you know you better do something before it’s too late.
If after reading this far and you don’t know what you’re willing to change, then you might not be ready to. And that’s okay. Come back in a few days, a few weeks or a few months, when you are ready and more open to it.
As a therapist, I am never going to force you or tell you to do something you don’t want to do. However, as a therapist, I will tell you what you should do if you want to turn your marriage around.
BUUUUT…Let me ask you this: Are you willing to at least be a little nicer, kinder, and sweeter to your wife? If the answer is yes, then maybe you are open to the idea of change. Maybe you are open to doing something a little bit different, so you can have a better marriage, save it, and enjoy it.
Let me be real with you, if your wife is saying the word divorce, that is not a good thing. Especially if she is saying it more and more lately. That means she FEELS like saying it, which means she does not feel happy in your marriage.
I look at her saying it not only as words, but more importantly, a reflection of what she is feeling, which is unhappiness in your marriage. Guys, let’s be honest, doesn’t being really unhappy at something usually lead to a change? Why would your wife be any different?
Here’s what I want for you. I want you to not just save your marriage, but to enjoy your marriage, so let’s do better today.
The truth is your behavior, words, and actions have made her use the “D” word. Is that how you really want your wife to feel? I know I wouldn’t and I hope you don’t either.
Here’s how you can start repairing it- just own it.
Own that you were an asshole, a dick, not very nice and hurt her. Ask yourself, if I was truly sorry for hurting my wife, what would I say?
Would you say, “Babe, I was a real asshole yesterday, and even this whole weekend (or week), and I’m really sorry. I know I hurt you and I’m sorry.”
Now those are my words, but it’s your marriage, so what would you say if you were truly and sincerely sorry for hurting your wife?
Here’s the good news, if you have made it this far, you might be more open to change thank you think. Here’s some even better news: your wife is still there.
Why is she still there?
Because deep down she wants you to change, so she can enjoy your life together, your marriage, and your family.
Guys, I promise you, your wife would rather sing your praises to her friends than bitch about how you made her feel and how you hurt her.
It’s not too late to change. While it’s not too late to change, time might also be running out if you are reading a post like this.
As a matter of fact, just like in Rocky IV, “If I could change, then you can change, anybody can change.” Ok that’s just a harmless blog joke, but you get the point.
It is not too late to change your behavior. It is not too late to work on your marriage and grow into the person your wife desperately wants you to be. Besides, don’t you want to enjoy your marriage and be in a loving and fun marriage? I hope so. You know who else also does? Your wife!
As a therapist, I work with men who are married and want to work on their behavior to make their marriage better. Click below to read more about that service.
Therapy for Men: who are Married — Dating and Relationship Services
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