Prompt Number Three: Your Values and Passions
Previously I talked about using an opinion post for your third prompt. But what if you don’t want to use an opinion prompt? That is perfectly okay. I want you to have choices.
I want you to not just have choices for your third prompt, but for each of these prompts on your dating profile.
In my opinion (no pun intended, based on the last chapter), this next prompt is just as good a prompt, if not better. I call it the values prompt.
What exactly is this prompt about?
This is a prompt where you get to say who you are, and what you love, in a way that is different and unique to the next person/profile.
What exactly does it mean to say something that is unique and valuable to you?
Does it mean saying you can name the entire 53-man roster of your favorite football team? Probably not, as that’s a little too niche for a good dating profile.
What you are going to say are the values you have as a person, and things you love.
The things you value and love are going to differ from person to person.
For example, I wrote about loving my career, and dedication to it, while you might write about a love for your children, anime, or your favorite sports team.
Your values and passions differ from the next person, because they are yours. This prompt is about being able to state them in a confident and attractive manner.
Where did I learn about this prompt?
The idea for this prompt came from a website and dating coach called Todd V Dating.
A few months after the dating app cohort ended, I came across his work, as I was still searching for solutions to help my dating life.
He has a lot of good information about games, dating profiles, and the world of dating. What he stated about this prompt was to make it a prompt that was more contrasting to the other prompts you have.
How to make it contrast?
For example, if you have a bold profile that portrays an alpha male/ bad boy, and bold-ish image, you are going to want to have a prompt that shows a nice, sweet, and even endearing side of you.
In my case I had a relationship prompt, a fun date prompt, and a profile with pictures that made me look like I lived the highlife in NYC.
When I heard this piece of advice, I knew it made sense, I just didn’t know how to use it and apply to the profile yet. That is until one faithful night when a couple of good friends gave me the inspiration for it.
How I got the inspiration for this prompt?
On this night, a couple of friends of mine came over to hangout. We watched tv, played games, and just had a fun night talking; as we always do.
At one point the conversation shifted to my career and work as a therapist. I described what I do as a therapist, the people I work with, and how I love helping them.
This must have hit quite the nerve, because the next thing out of their mouth was absurd. They replied, “But you're not a psychologist.”
This back and forth about how I was not a psychologist, and only a therapist, went on for a good 30-45 minutes.
When they left I realized what happened. They completely talked down to me about my career. When I put it all together the next morning, I was pretty pissed.
Then I connected the dots.
I can’t exactly tell you how, why, or when, but something clicked with how I could make this a great prompt. I realized I loved my career, helping others, and was dedicated to it.
I took the information from Todd V and applied to my own dating profile. When I finally did it read like this.
Prompt: Green Flags I look for
Answer: Respecting my Career and Dedication to it.
When I finally connected the dots, I had what I consider to be a really good prompt. I also jokingly refer to it, as the first ever spite prompt.
I just wanted to spite these two. They made me feel less than in my career, and in my own values of helping others, myself, and personal growth.
What this prompt really says?
While the exact information from Todd described this prompt as something that should be sweet and endearing, this prompt wasn’t exactly that. However it is attractive, and confident.
This prompt, which consisted of seven simple words, said I loved my career, my dedication to it, and I’m proud of it.
When this prompt was subbed in for that ridiculous sounding Tequila prompt, it did much better. I didn’t just get girls saying things like, “Yes!” or, “I know.”
It got likes and comments that included girls asking about what I did. It came with immediate interest, intrigue, and of course a chance to start a conversation.
How it was perceived?
The girls who did match, like, and comment were those who were likely curious about my career enough to match, comment, and like the profile.
They also likely found it confident and attractive to speak about a career this way.
It’s also likely not too many others spoke about themselves and their career in this type of way, whether in person or on a dating profile.
Why it was attractive?
Girls want to be with a man who knows who he is, and what he wants, that is sexy!
Yes, this prompt was brief, but it packed a punch (remember fun and punchy). It packed a punch that said I love my career, I love what I do, and I love growing in it.
This is highly attractive, and much more attractive than a random opinion about tequila.
What if you don’t love what you do?
We'll not write about it in a dating profile. There are better ways to say who you are, and you love (your passions and values).
I want you to write about the things you do love and are passionate about. Whether those things are your children, your family, giving to charity (sweet and endearing), reading a good book, personal growth, music.
Whatever it is that you are passionate about and love, I want you to write about it.You are going to put your passions and values in this prompt.
These passions are unique to you, as everyone’s usually different to a certain degree.
Of course, some people will have similar passions, and values, but likely, you don’t share them across the board with everyone. Besides, the most important part is having the confidence and courage to speak about them.
So, what do we write about?
As to what you might write in this prompt, it should be determined by what you love.
For example, I love self-help and personal growth. I might write about that in this prompt. If you are a father, and absolutely love being a father, you might write about that.
When you write about who you are, and what you love, it makes the prompt unique to you.
Let’s take a look at what some of these prompts might look like
Prompt: My biggest accomplishment:
Answer Number One: Overcoming adversity and climbing the ranks.
Answer Number Two: Getting my master's in social work.
Prompt: Green flags I look for
Answer: Loving my two boys as much as I do.
One thing I really want to do this year:
Answer: Grow in my career
Answer: Grow my business
Write it down and pick the prompt.
When you write about what really drives you inside, it’s attractive. The girl sees this as attractive because you are willing to share yourself, and speak to who you are, without any doubt in mind; it shows confidence.
It says you know who you are, and what you want (especially if you use the green flags prompt). Write down the passions and things you feel strongly about, and make you the person you are.
Once you do that, simply pick the prompt that works best with that answer/statement.
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