When you should chill out in Dating?
When I speak to my peers and friends in the dating world, I’m always amazed by two things.
How much they do? and don’t do and go through to avoid the pain of rejection?
And how there are a few simple ways you can avoid that pain with just simple action.
*Notice, I did not say, avoiding the rejection, I said avoiding the pain of it.
Here’s the cool thing if you are reading this, the ball is in your court, you clicked on this page for a reason, and know exactly what you want to work through. The emotions you have, the urges you have are the hardest thing there is to work through the challenges you think and feel in your single and dating life.
If you are frustrated with dating apps, dating profiles, and a lack of success in your dating life, it’s not just a chance and time to take new pictures, and have a complete overhaul, it’s also time to completely wipe the slate clean in your dating life, and build it with your actions from scratch!
But why do we get stuck? and stop ourselves from taking that simple action?
Why do we get stuck in the world of A.I ( and I don’t mean, “The Answer”), scrolling, YoutTube Videos and Reddit forums. As a therapist, and someone who once had to go through the emotional pain, ups, and downs of disappointments in the dating world, I want you to enjoy dating, and the key to that enjoyment, is the simple actions that we don’t avoid.
Enjoying dating to me comes down to two simple things, having a dating profile, that leaves you feeling content with plenty of matches, and dates, that is truly you, and at the same time a healthy boundary with how you even interact with the phone and the app (it should not consume you), and taking simple action when you see a cute girl and want to call a girl for a first, second, third or next date.
I want you to take that action, and chill the F out, it’s just that we feel the unpleasant emotions, those unpleasant physical sensations, then don’t take action, feel another certain way, usually anger or frustration, and continue on a crappy repeated cycle, F*&&^ that!
So Why is it so hard to be single, dating, and chill the f out in this part of your life?
Well let’s look at dating apps, where is the app on a phone? The app is designed to give you a dopamine hit, with just the way a message, or notification pops up on the app or on the phone. We now associate that good feeling with that app, and now need to hold, scroll and be on the phone to get, and have a chance at that dopamine hit.
Let’s face it, if we are always chasing a dopamine hit especially in the area of our dating lives, and using an app to get there, we are always going to be drawn to the phone, wanting more and more .
What about in person approaches and calling that girl for that first date, or next date? They suck too, because we have to sit there, with a fear of rejection, which might carry shame after it happens, it might even carry a physical, painful feeling before we do. I get it, I’ve been there and won the trophy with both of these. But please, ask yourself what’s more important? The feeling these things carry? or the simple action of calling and texting for that date, and approaching that cute girl.
If you are reading this, I really hope you have some insight that some simple action is WAAAAYYYYY more important than the emotions and waves that come and go not just in that moment, or in that day, but in life.
So guys, I’ll be sharing Part II of this tomorrow. In the meantime if you are single and dating, you can check out the links below, which detail exactly the pictures and how I used them, and made them myself to meet and date my true ten, (love you baby).
Picture 1: Your Rooftop Picture: https://www.datingandrelationship.services/blog-dating-and-relationships/online-dating-profile-the-rooftop-picture
Picture 2: Your Social Picture: https://www.datingandrelationship.services/blog-dating-and-relationships/online-dating-picture-number-two-the-social-picture
Picture 3: Your Vacation Picture: https://www.datingandrelationship.services/blog-dating-and-relationships/online-dating-picture-number-three-your-vacation-picture
Picture 4: Your Steak Picture: https://www.datingandrelationship.services/blog-dating-and-relationships/dating-profile-picture-steakhouse-picture
Picture 5: Your Boxing Picture: https://www.datingandrelationship.services/blog-dating-and-relationships/picture-number-five-your-boxing-picture
Picture 6: Your Hobby Picture: Dating Profile Picture Number Six: Your Hobby Picture. — Dating and Relationship Services
If you’d like to contact me, you can do so here.
If you’d like to subscribe to my therapy, and coaching newsletter, where I post and write articles in dating, relationships, and personal growth, you can do so here.
